Blue Tassels

Numbers 12

Miriam, who is a person I completely forgot about, but maybe she participated in some celebratory dancing. Or maybe she’s a prophetess. Anyway, Miriam and Aaron are grumpy because Moses married an Ethiopian woman. So, they talk trash about him

God says “Every other prophet sees me in dreams, but I talk to Moses face to face. What made you think it was a good idea to speak out against my favorite?” And he turns Miriam into a leper. Nothing happens to Aaron. Because it’s important to always punish the powerless more than the powerful. Men are more powerful than women, and therefore punished less severely.

Anyway, Moses prays to God to take away Miriam’s leprosy. God agrees to just banish her from camp for seven days instead. Everyone has to wait around for a week, because they don’t want to travel without Miriam.

Numbers 13

God sends spies into the land of Canaan. They report that the land is truly full of milk and honey (literally full of grapes, though), but the cities are well populated and defended.

Caleb wants to try taking over the land, but the spies protest “Nooooooooooooooo, the men are all giants!”

Numbers 14

The children of Israel say for the billionth time “We should have just stayed in Egypt!” rather than have to fight these giants.

Joshua and Caleb say “but the Lord is with us! He will protect us.” For this the children of Israel want to stone them to death. No joke. God’s chosen people want to stone two of their own to death for believing in God’s power.

God is feeling rejected and wants to kill everyone. Moses manipulates him into forgiving them. . . kind of. He wont kill them, but he wont let anyone who rejected him get to the land of milk and honey. So, I guess instead of killing all of them, he is planning on killing a lot of them later.

Numbers 15

A man is stoned to death for gathering sticks on the Sabbath.

God tells everyone to wear blue tassels to help them remember the commandments. Hopefully that blue tassel will prevent them from being stoned to death, right?